A BLANKET INVITATION

 There is something about a blanket. They are just so dang inviting. 

As soon as I throw one on, you can bet a pet is not far behind!

“What’s this? A cosy lap complete with blanket? Count me in!”

Blankets mean welcome and warmth. They are cosy and protecting.

I have a couple bargain blankets that I drag around from living room in front of the TV to back yard when the wind picks up to the cottage for coolish mornings by the lake. 

Eva is partial to the yellow one with the flowers. A snuggle on Dad’s lap makes it even better!

And Soren was not going to miss out on the fun either. 

                      It’s hard to resist a blanket invitation!              

                                 Well, most of the time….

IT’S A PRIVILEGE

 Last weekend Sheldon and I had the privilege of staying at a cottage. The weather was beautiful; crisp, cool nights and soft goodbye summer sun during the day. 

It’s a privilege to share space with this much beauty! Lulu loved it!

We took walks down the country roads to take in the last of the fall colours

 With no streetlights around, the night creeps in quickly. It’s a privilege to watch a golden sunset over the lake.

And in the morning (my favourite time), the Adirondack chairs called me back to sip hot coffee wrapped in a blanket

On a hike in the woods, Red maples, yellow oaks and beech trees with copper leaves scattered all around us and covered the ground

Back at the cottage, I washed up the dinner dishes and stared at this view, so much better than the 1980’s ceramic tile under a fluorescent tube I have at home!

It occurred to me there were only a handful of people around me on this little spit of land. All this beauty, all this space for us to enjoy. Many of us live in noise, chaos, crowds. Many of us rarely have a moment to ourselves! 

This weekend at a cottage in the woods was a privilege and I did not take it for granted and sent up my Thanks and appreciation. 

I hope and pray for the little gifts you can enjoy for strength and refreshing. I know it’s a privilege, but you are worth it. 

THE WHIRLWIND CROSS COUNTRY TOUR

 Every now and then, a one-of-a-kind opportunity shows up. Recently I had the opportunity to drive across Canada in a whirlwind tour with my son. Adrian and Carolyn decided to move back to Ontario (yippee!) from Vancouver and as Carolyn and Prince Caleb were flying back Adrian would have to drive. The Mama in me did not want him doing such a trek alone so I flew out and met him in Kelowna for the drive back together. 

The 5 day whirlwind mother/son tour involved stops in Calgary, Brandon Manitoba, Thunder Bay and Sault Ste. Marie. We drove anywhere from 7 hours to 13 hours a day! 

But Oh, Canada! What a beautiful country you are! The Rockies will take your breath away. Lunches consisted of crackers, cheeses, apples, blueberries and sugar snap peas. Revelstoke was our first lunch stop and a local snapped a pic for us!

Carolyn brother Joel and his wife Adrienne put us up for the first night in Calgary and Adrienne made a fresh pecan pie with and crisp oat crust. 

      We took some of this bad boy on the road with us!

The prairies gave us a cloud free endless sky the entire way through Manitoba and Saskatchewan

Ontario has it’s own charms too, including quick connections with old friends! In Thunder Bay, my friend Michelle met us in the morning with Starbucks for the road! 

It was a brisk morning in northern Canada and a hot bevy and warm smile were greatly appreciated! 

Then, a quick stop in Massey Ontario for a hug from my sweet friend Jocelyn! 

The Rockies are incredible but Ontario has it’s charms as well

         I stuck my toes into Lake Superior. It is C.O.L.D.

Neither Adrian and I are big talkers so we enjoyed a mixed Spotify playlist: John Mayer, Coldplay, City and Colour, The Arkells, Black Pumas, Jamiroquoi, Pink Floyd and Queen, Night at the Opera. We also worked our way through an Audio story about a group of Immortals dodging bad guys from Tibet to Alaska!

After 5 days, we arrived in Peterborough where we met Carolyn and Caleb at her parents and Sheldon drove up to join for supper before taking me home. 

This was the most one-on-one time I’ve had with my son since he was a baby. I know it was a gift of time together. Thanks to Sid and Cheryl, Marc and Sarah, Amanda, Joel and Adrienne, Michelle and Jocelyn who fed us, gave us a place to sleep and/or loved on us. And Thanks Adrian for taking your Old Mom on a whirlwind cross-Canada road tour! 

MORNINGS ARE MY FAVOURITE!

 

How has your summer been? We who live in the northern hemisphere (in my case, Canada), treasure and savour summer, trying to make the most of the longer, warm days. 

Mornings are my favourite any time of the year and summer mornings have their own warmth and charm. This summer, I’ve had the chance to enjoy not one but two different cottages. In the mornings with a steaming cup of coffee, Lulu and I, sit by the water,  listening to the simple sounds of loons, the occasional low rumble of a motor boat and water gently lapping up to the shore. 

Ah….the serene quiet life I live….

But mornings as an empty nester have been a little different this summer. My daughter and her family are in the midst of building their first home which has a way to go before it’s finished…and they are trying to make do with a trailer on the lot. Which also means they spend a fair bit of time at our house showering and enjoying such luxuries as space, laundry and a TV!

So now my mornings often include grand babies and tired parents. 

Some things remain the same. I still have DandyLion, my water obsessed cat hanging around the bathroom waiting for me to turn on the faucet.

I’m quite used to looking at this furry butt first thing in the morning.

But now there is a 4-year-old and a baby causing all sorts of bittersweet moments as well. 

One morning both were up and about. Soren managed to step in something Lulu had thrown up, and that sent him into a downward spiral. We managed to get his foot cleaned up and calmed him down enough to start his breakfast. 

He very quickly managed to knock his cereal bowl and spill milk all over. 

Meanwhile, Baby Eva sits in her high chair singing “Hot Cross Buns” that sounds more like “Haw, cos uns…haw, cos uns!” 

It’s chaos and wonder, a bittersweet mix of joy and frustration all in one. It is NOT serene, quiet and peaceful!

Still, Mornings are my favourite! 

ENCOUNTERS WITH A HUMMINGBIRD

 

Last week, as I sat in the garden enjoying my coffee a little hummingbird stopped by to visit the flowers. 

It was so close to me I could have touched it! I watched it hover and dart tasting each of the rain drenched offerings. It’s little wings a blur and it’s back a beautiful iridescent sheen. 

I found myself staying perfectly still, barely breathing and  amazed at this little bird in wondrous flight. 

Sometimes, when you observe something so beautiful you “make space” for the sacred moment, without even realizing it. It could be a sunrise or sunset, a baby sleeping, the woman/man of your dreams walks into your life, a hummingbird visit. 

I’ve supported many people who are grieving and many need you to make space for them. Stop talking. Listen. Stay still. Let their grief flow, it needs room to expand. You might have nothing to say to make things better and that’s OK.

This morning I’m at a cottage, overlooking a serene lake on a grey day. As I sip my coffee, listening to the wind sigh in the pines and the birdsong, who should come along but a little hummingbird! 

Life throws us a lot of frustrations and pain. I appreciate these sacred encounters! 

HAVING THE OPPOSITE EFFECT

 Our cat DandyLion is a fluffy fella. 

As you can see! 

With a plume of a tail that sails behind him. Unfortunately, he also became very matted. Dandy’s cleaning abilities fall into the category of a classic teenager and their bedroom. Try as I might to keep up with brushing and taking scissors to cut out the worst of them, he reached a point where a full on shave was necessary. 

The vet suggested a “Lion” cut. Now I’ve had cats all my life but never have I had to take a cat to the groomers for a Lion cut. So this was new to me. 

My husband took Dandy Boy in last week and here are the results:

Just look at that little lion!

We thought he would be all embarrassed and humiliated. But in fact his new trim had the opposite effect. He’s proud and flicks that tail with all the arrogance of one of his big cat ancestors. 

Sometimes, we don’t know how great something is without a comparison. We need the opposite effect. 

After a day or work what feels better than slipping into comfy clothes? 

After a weekend of back country camping, a hot shower is enough to make one swoon. 

You don’t really know how much you love and appreciate something or someone until it’s gone! 

Sometimes I grumble and complain, but I’m aiming for the opposite effect. One where I learn to recognize and value. 

Proverbs 13:12 “Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but when desire is fulfilled it is a tree of life.” 

A GOOD RAIN

 

A few weeks ago, we had a storm past through Ontario. It was a doozy called a “Derecho”. A derecho is a hopped up thunderstorm that can bring hurricane force winds, tornados, and heavy rain. It comes in like wrecking ball, so to speak.

When people hear the words “palliative care” they associate this to the type of care required for those dying. Like a last ditch effort, throw all the surgery or medications at the beast and hope for the best. They see the derecho approaching. 

 Over two decades ago, the World Health Organization actually changed the definition of palliative care to a much broader scope! The focus was on improving the quality of life for those facing chronic and life threatening illnesses through early identification and a proactive approach involving physical, psychosocial and spiritual concerns. It focuses on the whole patient, body, soul and spirit. The oncologist or specialist have their role, but so does professional, like social worker or an End of Life Doula! It involves our community supporting the family with practical needs like a good meal or giving them a break in caregiving. It involves exploring and supporting spiritual discussions. A good palliative care approach identifies the patients goals and includes some proactive discussions (advance care planning) about the what ifs and how they can be handled. It is a “Good Rain” - gentle, soft, preparatory and not a Derecho for the patient and caregivers to find themselves in, full of fear and crisis and surprises. 

The sooner palliative care is started, the better the outcomes for the patient and, in fact, stats show they live longer. 

I had a very dear friend who was diagnosed with a terminal cancer. I encouraged her to ensure she got good palliative care. She said “Oh, I don’t need that.” She felt that was for someone really at the end, the last ditch derecho time. She passed within 6 weeks of her diagnosis, with no time for her or her family to really prepare. 

I don’t expect we will yet get past the bias of the word “palliative” for some time yet. We are going on 20 years now with only a little progress on the benefits! 

Still, I hope if you find yourself facing a life-threatening or chronic illness like COPD or congestive heart failure, you will explore the palliative care approach. You will find yourself in a Good Rain.

CHECKING ONE OFF THE BUCKET LIST

 I’m sitting on a little balcony, overlooking a leaf covered square. Below me, in the late afternoon heat the locals and the occasional lost tourist who stumble across this little piece of paradise are sheltering under the massive tree in the shade. They sit in companionable groups sipping drinks as I listen to their musical lilted French amidst the clink of classes and occasional rumble of tiny cars or bicycles. Students, phones in hand, are the same everywhere! 

I’m on a Bucket List trip in France! We spent a few days in Paris then made our way by train to Avignon in the Provence region. Tomorrow, it is back to Paris for one more day before we fly home. 

It is all so beautiful!

And Ancient!

It is Timeless here. The rhythm includes, cafes, bikes, smoking and cafe au laits. Paris is truly a noisy cacophony day and night with lights and action. But Avignon is soft, sleepy and I would even be inclined to rent a bicycle! 

And the Food!! On Mon Dieu!! Don’t get me started!!

Ok, maybe just a few pics…

I’m so grateful and humbled to have this opportunity of a lifetime. I have so many more pics (all taken with my iPhone 13 BTW!) that I suppose I will have to create a book. In a couple of days we fly back to Canada, to routine, and familiar sounds and smells. I’m very routine oriented so this will be a good thing.

Still…..France….you truly are a special place on this earth.

TAKING A BIG BREATH OF COMMUNITY

 This past Saturday was a breathe of fresh air. A breathe of community.

Downtown Belleville hosted the “Savour The Chill” Soup Contest. The Family-fun event brought our community together with spoons on hand. It was great to see so many enjoying a crisp but sunny day! There were fires to warm up around, marshmallows to toast and even the Snow Queen and Princess made an appearance! By the way, did I mention the soups? Cheeseburger soup, Split pea, broccoli with bacon and cheese, roasted tomato basil to name a few. The Winner was Chilangos with their Caldo Tlalpeno, a traditional Mexican soup of chicken and vegetables. 

I conversed with strangers on the soups to be checked out, listened to the chatter of family and friends, patted the heads of happy dogs and took in a big breathe of community. 

But there was more to come! In the evening I volunteered for Coldest Night of the Year (CNOY), a fundraiser for local charities that support the homeless, hurting and hungry. The funds raised would be directed to our local Shelter, Grace Inn. This was the first time Grace Inn has acted as host and they did an amazing job. 

Now I’m not new to this rodeo, having been involved with CNOY in a variety of roles over the years. But I hit the Gold Ticket this time. My job was to drive around in MiCkey, my Mini Cooper all warm and cosy with the tunes playing and a hot chocolate on hand. 

So with flags flying I zipped around the route feeling like a pace car honking and waving at all those Yellow hats bobbing along ensuring everyone was having a good, safe walk. 

You Go Yellow Hats! You Go My Community! 

In all there were 34 teams made up of 165 walkers and $61,000 was raised in support of Grace Inn! How amazing was that! 

When a unified body of people, a Community, get together to support and connect with one another the world can be changed. Now, more than ever, the world needs Community and connection. 

Thank you Downtown Belleville. Thank you Grace Inn. For letting me breathe fresh air today. 

MUSICAL TRIGGERS

 One thing I find that makes humans so quirky is how we can be deeply affected by triggers. You see someone or something that hops you right back into your memory banks and relive the moment. Emotional triggers can be tricky to navigate. Smells can trigger all sorts of layers, good and bad! 

But I want to focus on musical triggers. Those songs or even a snippet of a song that sticks in your head and can send your thoughts on all sorts of tangents! 

Here’s a couple of examples: sometimes when I’m riding my bike at a nice clip, the theme comes into my head from Wizard of Oz and I can see the Wicked Witch Miss Gulch herself pumping her bike along hellbent on putting an end to Toto.

Not that I think I’m the Wicked Witch, but the song is a perfect biking rhythm!

Speaking of Toto, once as I was riding through town there was construction going on and just as I passed a couple of workers one of them yelled “99” over the noise and boom the song “99” from Toto was in my head! Like from ummm almost 50 years ago!

 https://youtu.be/qhw-XlTMB5I   

A bird flys by and suddenly “Free Bird”https://youtu.be/QxIWDmmqZzY  

Which makes me think managing these triggers is like corralling cats which triggers “The Cat Came Back”. https://youtu.be/LjMffHG1V_Q

A couple are bickering - “Why Can’t We Be Friends” https://youtu.be/sH0Qda32IKM

Hey, it’s Saturday night! “S.A.TUR.DAY…NIGHT!” https://youtu.be/7BKKaKT_dtM 

Lord help me.

Someday, I’m going to start at the beginning of a day and write down all the songs and what triggered them to go off in my head. I mean it is not just me, right? I think not. All you music buffs have the same jukebox going on triggered at the drop of a coin. I’m sure of it!